Exposing40

Friends. Photography. Adventure.

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40 over 40

So, this list was born out of a ‘for fuck’s sake’ moment, which if truth be told is the starting point for many of my posts! Earlier this year I read an article about ’40 under 40′ and tweeted that I might just make a ’40 over 40′ list! Don’t get me wrong, I know it’s important to celebrate young talent and I know that most of the lists in professional journals are just PR guff, but it’s still annoying that public recognition for talent and value is so often given an age cap. I’d written about the issue of invisibility as we age just a couple of months earlier. The tweet was well-received with lots of people saying ‘yay, do it’. And that’s as far as I got. Then I decided to resurrect the idea for the Twixtmas period and my end of year round-up. Some points to note:

1) Bloggers under 40 are amazing too – this is just a game.

2) There is zero science to this whatsoever – if you want an extraordinary list that someone puts hours and hours of work into then you need to read the Top 100 Sex Bloggers list that Molly curates every year.

3) This was compiled through me already knowing people’s ages and through people putting their hand up to being over 40 or giving others shout outs.

4) I thought I’d be struggling to come up with 40 but I ended up with way more. So I’ve started with my A team and then there’s 40 listed alphabetically. My game my rules!

5) Don’t be offended if you’re not on here – it was all done very quickly! This is just fun and the list can get to 140 if necessary so feel free to ask to be added. I’m not going to reorder it to keep it alphabetical though. That was an arse enough first time round so I’ll just add to the bottom now!

The A Team

Haiku

I’ve included a link to an account where Haiku sometimes lists her work but really you’ll find her all over – she’s at my place regularly and has guested on The Other Livvy, GOTN, Bibulous and probably more. That’s just the kind of social butterfly she is. She’s a joy and my life would be less without her.

Honey

One of the most self-aware, honest and inspiring women I know. Too often hard on herself (IMO!) but the most loyal champion of her family and those close to her. I admire her strength of character so much.

Maria

Goddamn it woman, when are you moving to London Town? I can lose HOURS on Skype talking to Maria and I really find it hard to believe I’ve only met her once (even though that once involved all sorts of delicious and crazy adventures over 10 days she was my house guest).

Molly

Molly, the mothership! Where would we be without Molly? Where would I be without Molly? Sinful Sunday has brought so many wonderful people and awesome experiences into my life I can’t help but gush about it. The only problem with Molly is where she lives. I can accept infrequent meetings with Tabitha and Maria as they are miles away but Molly is just close enough to not feel far away but just too far away for impromptu outings like I enjoy with the South London people. Damn our busy work schedules. I hope for another Molly photo adventure one day!

Tabitha

Tabitha is a beacon of joy in our community but also the BEST person to share gossipy Prosecco-loaded pyjama parties with. I love this woman’s spirit and how she rallies us all with things like daily orgasm challenges. She writes fucking hot fiction, takes jaw-dropping photos but also – most importantly – writes with so much honesty and vulnerability about mental health and her relationship with her body. I am proud she let me photograph her.

1) A Queerer Journey

A new blogger and one I’m really looking forward to reading and seeing more of, not least because the man and women’s underwear combo. A kinkster blogging their journey from within the first month of their kink adventures is an interesting journey for readers to go on with them.

2) All a Blur

I love this man’s photography so much. He shares his work direct to his feed rather than on a blog, but he’s well worth a follow. He’s been shooting nude self portraits and nudes of others for 30+ years and his back catalogue is wonderful. I particularly like it when he shoots a new version of an old shot.

3) Anna Hopeful

I met Anna in the summer when she slid into my DMs and asked if she could come on the Brexit march with me. I’m so glad she did. She’s a dating blogger who as her pen name suggests was always hopeful – and the hope paid off because she’s at an exciting new chapter in her life. Dating bloggers seem to be less joyful than sex bloggers (the coal face of dating is far more brutal and with more ill-feeling, it seems) so it’s nice to have found such a happy dating blogger.

4) Bibulous One

I love this blog so much. I love it for the openess with which it is written and how much B wears his heart on his sleeve. It allows me insight into a world I’d otherwise never understand and that’s a real privilege. And his most thoughtful posts (like the one about telling his brother about his blog) are spine-tingling.

5) Candy Snatch Reviews

I  read Candy’s blog but mainly I just stare at her photos. Her hair, her make-up, her clothes! I bloody love how she curates her look – so much care and attention and to stunning effect. She’s the opposite to me with my ‘fling something on and minimal make-up’ and I drink it in. But we women are more than how we look so don’t just stare, read her amazing reviews too!

6) Cousin Pons

A newish blogger and one whose appearance clashed with my mad year of work that hammered my reading time. The small amount of his writing I got to was wonderful and I hope to get to more in 2019. His Sinful Sundays are fabulous and I’ve been glad to see him make the round-up more than once!

7) Elliott Henry

This man is a master class in finding multiple ways to photograph masturbation and his site is a feast of creative dick pics. More recently he’s had a regular guest whose photography is stunning! Also, he sends real post which is lovely to receive!

8) E T Costello

Filthy hot writing (do read Lust and the Scrubber!) and a talented artist so check out his drawings as well as his writing.

9) Eve Ray

I met Eve at my first Eroticon in 2016 when F Dot Leonora introduced us over Friday dinner and I’ve loved catching up with her at each one since. She was part of the awesome Smutathon team that raised a bunch of cash for good causes in the summer. High five!

10) Eye

Oh, what to say about wonderful Eye. A role model on how to age elegantly and confidently and what an example to those who need to make a significant change in their life.

11) Ferns

I love reading this blog! I think the main reason I manage to keep on top of this blog so much better than others is all the short pithy and very funny posts!

12) Fettler

I can’t remember how I first came across Fettler’s work but I think we’ve been chatting on and off for almost as long as E40 has been going. His self-portraits are absolutely stunning and regularly shared on Twitter but recently I’ve been happy to see him make an appearance on Sinful Sunday as a guest of May More.

13) Focused and Filthy

I don’t know what to say about this site other than 9/10 I really wish I’d taken the photos! They are amazing. F&F suggested we have a photo adventure in 2019 and frankly I can’t bloody wait!

14) Grace O’Malley

Grace doesn’t seem to be blogging as regularly at the moment but I loved the editing effect she used to use on her Sinful Sundays that gave them the appearance of old masters and I hope she does more again in the future.

15) Hy

Purveyor of the best boob shots in town and the chief of the Boob Day meme, not to mention the most emotional and often painfully raw writing. Often I don’t enjoy Hy’s posts and I want to wrap her in a bear hug but they’re always a powerful read.

16) Indigo Byrd

I think Indigo saw more of the UK in six weeks than some of us see in six years!! So much ground covered and so many cheeky photos along the way!

17) Inner Devil

Not a blogger, but oh my – the legs photos. So many gorgeous photos, so much amazing hosiery!

18) Jedi Hamster

Jedi Hamster is generally more present on my blog than her own, both behind and in front of the camera and as the author of the occasional guest blog. Plus, as I’ve mentioned before, she came up with the E40 name! But once a year her own blog springs to life with her annual New Year New Movies challenge where she watches and blogs about a new film every day in January. So, if you like your movies head on over.

19) Kilted Wookie 

Just look at the man’s photos. Some of my favourite photos of a naked man that I haven’t taken myself!

20) Kisungura

Another new blogger whose work I haven’t had chance to read this year (well, until reading the review of the year just now), but oh my god – the photos! Sensational addition to the Sinful Sunday stable!

21) Marie Rebelle

Marie Marie, how do you get everything done?! It’s been said in more than one round-up this year than you, Molly and Kayla are some kind of super women. Thank you for all you do, for all you wonderful comments and congratulations on the Smut Marathon success. I look forward to 2019’s!

22) Master Pleasing Bitch

What a year this woman has had. Her diary of her breast cancer journey has been deeply fascinating, if that’s a word I can use – it will undoubtedly be a very valuable resource for many women in the future. But it’s not just the cancer – Julie has had a full on year all round – house move, retirement. Wow. I hope 2019 is relaxed.

23) May More

ALL the photos makes me sigh, but the summer pool photos made me downright envious. And the fishnet ones through the autumn. And I love how supportive May is of other bloggers. A great champion!

24) Miss Scarlet

Miss Scarlet started blogging just a few weeks after me and over the years the posts I’ve enjoyed the most are the ones where she discusses and explored issues around body confidence. I love how honest and supportive this community is around these things.

25) Modesty Ablaze

I love love love Modesty’s Polaroids Past series – they are just so evocative of moment in time and they always make me wish I had more photos of when I was young. And her cheeky holiday photos are always hilarious!

26) Mrs Fever

The thing about someone not being on Twitter is that you don’t get to know them as well as well as you do other people in the community and you forget to check for new posts when they’re not rolling past you on the timeline. But this woman’s writing is always amazing in my opinion. She has a unique style that I love.

27) Ollie and Dave

I’m a fairly new follower of Dave’s and oh how I love his feed. I’m not such a fan of the photos he’s shares – a bit too much photoshopped ‘perfection’ that could leave some less body confident people insecure, but oh my – his own photos! They are stunning. The beaches! I want to employ him as a location scout for my photos. And Ollie is a dog.

28) Posy Churchgate

I must admit that I haven’t read as much of Posy’s work as I realise now I should have done, but I always read her #SoSS – I love that she goes to the effort of interviewing people for them!

29) Sex is My New Hobby

I miss seeing Zoe on Sinful Sunday as much as she used to be there – her dancer’s posture made for some superbly poised and intriguing photos. I hope to see them again one day. In the meantime her photos taken on her travels continue to entertain!

30) Signs

Content warning: Signs is a lot less scary in real life than he sometimes appears on Twitter. 😝
The first time I went to Molly and Michael’s for dinner I was really nervous about meeting Michael. I shouldn’t haven’t been. He’s so giving of tech advice, a champion of best blog practice and his occasional writing on D/s Life is really thoughtful.

31) Silver Dom Hates Nazis

I am so sad that Silver Dom’s blog has had to go into hibernation for a while (hopefully not forever!). He was a champion of more cock in Sinful Sunday, which I’m always going to be on on board with, but more importantly he photographed changing bodies, disability and long-standing intimacy beautifully.

32) Southern Sir

I absolutely loved the series of photos he and Kayla did for February photo fest, showing the same scenes from their own perspectives. I also purchased a beautiful wooden plug as a birthday gift earlier this year and can highly recommend his wood artistry. Also, cheekily linking Kayla into John’s entry as she is very nearly 40. Thanks to Molly for rummaging around to find Kayla’s age!

33) Sub Bee

Apart from being wrong about London, Sub Bee is awesome and has great tits, or is that a great arse? I’m not sure! The photos that appear on her blog amaze me week after week. I always love the needle and wax photos the most!

34) Sweetgirl

Really interesting posts about her and her husband’s D/s developing, great reviews and hot Sinful Sundays. And another 1974 baby. Vintage year!

35) Tiggs

Tiggs will occasionally share with us a hot photo, but mainly I’m mentioning her here because she engages so enthusiastically with so many bloggers, frequently liking and responding to our posts and as a judge on Smut Marathon. But mainly because I only just found out she’s 40 and good lord, Sonny better believe I’m going to be taking him up on his offer of lunch for photos of Tiggs for E40!

36) The Guyliner

Hilarious dissections of the weekly Blind Date column in Guardian Weekend, thought-provoking opinions pieces on sexuality and belonging, a keen love of Lady Di and my birthday brother. Win.

37) Victoria Blisse

The smiliest happiest Sinful Sunday-er on the block. These photos always always make me smile, but gosh – those bruises! I’ve never seen anything like it!

38) Wet Coast Kat

A completely new one to me and someone who waved at me on Twitter when I asked who was 40+. But this podcast focused on non-monogamy is definitely on my to listen to list for next year.

39) Wriggly Kitty

I nearly fell over when I met the person behind this pen name earlier in the year. But what a nice surprise it was. When she participates in Sinful Sunday the photos are always great and I love the way she blogs about her life and how her circumstances have changed and continue to change in such an open way. Reading her blog feels like a chat with a friend sometimes.

40) Zak Jane Kier

Queen of organising and compering erotic readings and editor extraordinaire! Make sure you’re following Zak for opportunities to listen to great writers read their work and opportunities to submit your work.

So there we are, 40 (ok, 45!) amazing bloggers over 40. Let me know if you want to be added to the list. And Happy New Year!

As promised, I am adding more fabulous over forties as they come to my attention!

41) The Joy At It Flies. Some truly stunning photographs and interesting posts about her adventures. Plus she used to be a Brosette. Yay.

42) Melina Greenport. Melina and I shared the best newcomer spot in the 2016 Top 100 Sex Bloggers list. She doesn’t blog at the moment, which saddens me because her fiction was utterly brilliant and brilliantly quirky. Do check out her archives!

43) Lascivious Lucy. Author of paranormal erotic fiction and finder of the most awesome vintage images to illustrate her post!

Peony

For last year’s words belong to last year’s language 
And next year’s words await another voice.

T. S. Eliot

While trying to come up with a title for my New Year ‘firework’ photo I learnt that peony is the name of the firework that “has a starlike explosion that quickly turns into a bulging circle of stars.” So there you go, you learn something new every day! However you spend your New Year, fireworks or no fireworks, I hope it’s a happy one and may 2019 treat you all kindly.

Sinful Sunday

 

44: Droopy Drawers

This Sinful Sunday is extra special because it’s my birthday. Yay! Earlier this week I was pondering what to do for my photo when I thought ‘ooh, I wonder what the bingo call is for 44?’ Turns out it’s droopy drawers!! Mmm… If only I’d had this idea for 43; that’s Down on Your Knees and I have a whole load more hot and sinful photos in my archives that would illustrate that call. Oh well…

Sinful Sunday

Elust 113

By Quinn Rhodes a picture of a Doxy on a white hotel bed for Elust 113Photo courtesy of Quinn Rhodes

Welcome to Elust 113

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #114? Start with the rules, come back January1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

The Source of Control
Town Use
FOMO is NOT how my vagina feels about sex.

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

The Weight of my Red Self
Mistletoe kisses

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

If you want a job done…
*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Figuring Out Oral Sex
Why I Need Non-Monogamy in My Polyamory
A Love of Photography
Third trimester sex
Nights like Tonight
Finding a D/s partner is one long night

Erotic Non-Fiction

On Subspace
Petting
Control Takes Many Forms
The New Hood – a peek inside
The Past Smells of Men
Men in Panties

Erotic Fiction

Tease Me Under the Mistletoe
Art Class
Total Control
men in panties
In the Red Room
All Slippery and Floaty
Amour

Writing About Writing

The Writing on the Wall
Writing is the painting of the voice.

Body Talk and Sexual Health

Connection, No Sex

Writing About Writing

29 Blog Maintenance Things You Can Do

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

Champagne boys apply here
The other end of the cane
Giving me a frill

Poetry

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Elust

Holly Bush

Sinful Sunday

Winter in Sofia

“Let us learn to appreciate there will be times when the trees will be bare, and look forward to the time when we may pick the fruit.” Anton Chekhov

As many of you know, I’m on a travel quest to visit all the EU member states before next March (well, the 14 I hadn’t already visited). Friends and colleagues regularly say ‘ooh, you should blog about it’ and I chuckle as I brush them off with claims of not enough time. Little do they know how fruitful my travels have been – from shots of my tits on balconies and beaches, plus arse and cock!

After a couple of months in the drawer my passport is back in service this weekend and gosh the temperature has dropped in the last eight weeks! That and the fact that my travel companion is my aunt means this weekend isn’t the time for public nudity. But I wanted to bring you a flavour of stark grey wintry Bulgaria and so I laid a shot of the bare trees around the Russian Army Monument over one of me taken in my much cosier Airbnb!

Sinful Sunday

Birthday Girl

An off prompt photo from me this week, but today’s spot has to be given to the wonderful Jedi Hamster who turns 40 on Wednesday. She has appeared here a couple of times, has come up with the ideas for and shot more of my photos than I can remember and – most significantly! – she came up with my name. Exposing40 wouldn’t be Exposing40 without her. Happy birthday friend!

Sinful Sunday

Shits and Giggles

Honey, 19syllables and I have had a day out. We started off at the Royal Academy taking in the erotic nudes of Klimt and Schiele before wandering through the west end to Drury Lane where we grabbed a bite to eat and a bottle of fizz in Sarastro. Little did we know that we hadn’t see the last of the erotic art for the day! But when faced with these toilets we couldn’t not do photos, could we? It’s almost like I had a premonition when I named our WhatsApp chat ‘Shits and Giggles’ earlier in the week!

Sinful Sunday

A Love of Photography

“The show’s aim ultimately is to look at the couple as a catalyst for creative dialogue. What Modern Couples seems to suggest is that if love was the catalyst, it was often the photographer’s darkroom – that liminal, womb-like space – that incubated and protected creative fulfilment in its early form.” British Photography Journal

Some of you may have seen on Twitter or Exhibit A’s Sinful Sunday post last weekend that he and I went to see the Modern Couples exhibition at Barbican last weekend. Those of you who know either or both of us will undoubtedly know that photography is in the DNA of our dynamic. In fact I would say it’s the red thread. Before we’d even met he’d send me his photos for feedback or occasional editing before posting; his early Sinful Sundays are woven in my mind with memories of our earliest interactions. The first time I photographed him was only the second time we’d met.

Looking at that quote above, I would invert it for a more accurate commentary on us. Love was not a catalyst for creativity, but photography incubated and probably, at times, kept alive a friendship that over time has given way to a deep and nourishing affection. There were times in the early days of knowing each other that we didn’t always behave that well towards to each other but somehow we always stayed connected through the photography. We could sit and argue at his kitchen table in North London and 10 minutes later he’d be naked on his balcony and I’d be talking through an idea.

That I am more often than not the one behind the camera mirrors one of the objectives of the Barbican show, which is to subvert the notion that it is always the woman who is the muse. It would never have occurred to me to call Exhibit A a muse, but maybe he is. I certainly rarely think of anyone else first if I have an idea of how I would like to photograph a man, despite me shooting other partners since I started this blog. He’s a willing model if an idea seizes me and is up for many things that others wouldn’t be. A busy lido on a hot sunny day in July? Sure! I’ve messaged him on a weekday morning in February and 45 minutes later he’s been naked in his garden balancing on one leg. And when I’ve wanted him to be the one behind the camera he’s never really batted an eyelid at my rather random requests, whether that’s ‘make my belly look as fat as possible‘can you make a 50 in stars on my back’ or‘I want to balance this mirror on my throat.’

Of course, he means much more to me now than just being a willing photography partner in crime. We’ve got a mutual love of the Manics and a strong Spotify and ‘one for the road’ game too! Seriously though, there’s much I don’t recognise about either of us from the early days. His circumstances were very different, while I was reactivating a long dormant sex life (I’ll write about that one day!) and primarily interested in the physical. I was deeply and vocally averse to any suggestion of a more committed connection – with anyone. Over time, and largely through this community, I have learnt how relationship structures aren’t quite as black and white as I had always thought and I have realised there’s much on the spectrum between fully blended lives and friends with benefits.

That photography is still a big part of how he and I look, despite all the ways we’ve both evolved over last five years, makes me happy. I am probably biased, but I think our photography has got better as we have got better together. And this adventure has brought photography back into my life in a more significant way than it’s been for years. In my business I lead on production and writing – it’s my business partner who’s behind the camera. For years my relationship with photography was as an exhibition goer and travel snapper rather than anything more creative or thoughtful. I love that meeting EA and setting up my blog brought this part of me back.

While the “liminal, womb-like” darkroom (oh, how I miss those days!) may have given way to computers, the intimacy of the developing process has not been superseded by tech. The joy I feel at diving into the editing process is just as it was when I passed through the light-resistant revolving door into the deep red light of the darkroom at university. Last Sunday, flicking through my camera, EA looked at the original of the image below and commented that it hadn’t worked too well. ‘It’ll be fine in the edit,’ I said, because I knew the light was falling just right for me to realise the image that was in my head. The inspiration for the photo below was one we saw at the exhibition.

Writing about Modern Couples The Art Fund talked of it “charting how the concept of a ‘couple’ has evolved, along with society’s approach to marriage, family and gender, it showcases the way in which a variety of intimate relationships – traditional, famed, short-lived and fixational – have resulted in experimentation and, at times, subversion of the status quo.” I like this. I like that the couple is in inverted commas! And I like that I was at the exhibition with Exhibit A. I like that it showcased a multitude of relationship types and celebrated those where art was the lifeblood of them, not a by-product.

Last Sunday was a good day. It was also a funny day. Will he be a Dad next time I see him or will Baby Liv-EA keep them waiting and grant me and him another (closer to home!) meet-up? Who knows! But as his Uber was on its way I said ‘I am looking forward to the next chapter of us.’ And I really am. With all the other changes that will unfold there’s one thing I am sure of – there’ll definitely be photos!

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Wicked Wednesday... a place to be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked

Pencil Work

Photography is an immediate reaction, drawing is a meditation.Henri Cartier-Bresson

I can’t draw for toffee but editing this photo to look like a pencil sketch was very meditative. I probably could have done it in about 10 seconds on an app that turns photos into drawings, but I went old school and had a play around with the editing software on my computer!

Sinful Sunday
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